Today I noticed that I often have the impulse to give, but then I talk myself out of it. For example, I was going to send someone a copy of a book that I found inspiring and then I told myself, "What if they don't like it, or what if they already have it, or what if they think it's stupid?" So, I din't send the gift.
Then, there are the times when I am reading the discussions on this site and I am inspired by a giving opportunity, but I tell myself, "No, I want to give in a more personal way, not over the internet."
Or, I have the impulse to give my boyfriend a massage, and I tell myself, "He's probably in the middle of something."
The main thing I am noticing is that I talk myself out of givng - a lot. I have ideas and rules about how it should be and since it's not that way, I don't do it. Or, I feel vulnerable - will the other person respond in the way I want or need them to? I use all of these reasons not to give.
That said, today, I had the impulse to offer a particular client a free session. At first I retreated from this impulse and then I acted on it. I did make the offer. We will see if it is accepted and what comes of it.
I also bought flowers for our neighbor.
It feels good to be acting on the impulse to give.