Day 5th, October 5th
Today I gave the gift of thanks. Sounds weird I know but it was a gift of sorts. A little while ago I was sitting in bed and thinking of taking some pills. Darren has them all now; I have had my meds taken away a couple of times. This time I smuggled a couple to many and hide them from Darren. So I was sitting and thinking if I should leave a note or not. I had the laptop up and got a “ping” for receiving a personal message. I looked at the message and it was a friend that had moved away a while ago. She had mentioned my post (which were downers) and shared a church with me to visit. Then she went on to just “talk” that was it. I went ahead and answered her back – still thinking of taking my life. After awhile of “just talking” the thoughts of suicide were gone and my day was better. At the end of chatting my friend stated that she felt that God had led her to me that day to help. I realized what I had been thinking before the day long on and off chat and she was right God had led her to me! I then cried and got out of bed and started to work out … it worked J So back to the gift, today I went ahead and sent her a card telling her what I had been planning that day. In one of her messages to me that day she stated that she didn’t want to pry. I told her in the card today that I was sharing this with her because I wanted to make sure that she knew and would share that prying is not always a bad thing … It could save a life.