Day 7, October 7th
Friendship was my gift today, well really a garage opener. My friend S’s father is coming to town and she needed her garage door opener (I keep hers to feed her cat when she is out of town). S and I have not talked in a while because of my depression. I pushed people away and at first was ashamed of my depression. During one of the darkest times of my depression S’s mother passed away. I had talked to my counselor about going to the funeral to be there for S. At the time my counselor said that she felt that I should not go because I was having anxiety about having to tell S or other people there what was going on with me, no one knew at that point, some still don’t. Today was the first time that I had seen S since the unfortunate passing of her mother. I walked in and straight to her arms. I immediately knew that she needed me there. Darren and I needed to “get errands done” but I thought this was meant to be my gift: friendship & time. We spent about an hour with her talking about her mother and updates on my and her families “stuff”. Darren was such a support he hugged when needed and didn’t talk when needed (that sounds rude stating it like that but I don’t mean it that way). When we got up to leave there were more tears. I had told S what had been going on with me and she made me promise not to hurt myself. It felt good talking to her and I feel that now that I have let another person in my life “in” to my life I am gaining another supporter, funny when you are going through depression you don’t think that you have the support, yet they are all there around you. I think that in a week or so I will call to see if S would like to meet for lunch, she needs me and I need her on a friend level … ohh maybe we can get pedicures as well!!!