R16, D1

[IslandGirl]

I wanted to keep stretching myself today, to stay focused on giving. It wound up being a day with lots of small gifts. This morning, I gave a toonie to a man sitting on the street with a cap out in front of him. In thanks, he pulled out a harmonica and began playing "Frère Jaques" - which is his entire repertoire :)  It was a good reminder to me that gifts aren't necessarily about who "deserves" them most, but about the act of sharing. 

Later, I placed another toonie on top of noodle bowls in the grocery store. I didn't actually buy anything; I just went in there to get warm!

I remembered M's post about sending cards to Frank, so I decided to send a postcard of a cute sea otter, with cheerful wishes.

Then tonight brought another opportunity: Last week, I'd been at the bus stop with a woman who usually takes my bus, but that day, she was supposed to take a different bus to her sister's - and she missed it, which meant she had to wait another 70 minutes for the next bus. During that time, I learned, her sister became extremely worried. This woman is a former addict who lived on the street, and she doesn't have a cell phone; she's very sweet, and also very vulnerable. Tonight, I saw them both at the bus stop, and the sister recounted the story. I told her that I hadn't known how to help, but that if it happened again, I could call her. At which point she took me aside and gave me her name and number. (The former street woman had always struck me as funny and laid-back, but I got the impression tonight that perhaps there are additional issues.)

I also said no twice today: once to a young woman who is visibly a junkie and, on a daily basis, asks for change "for the bus". In the past, I've tried to give her food, and she's refused. She's not hostile, and it's not a case of judging her addiction - who knows what I'd do if I were in her shoes? - but something about the situation makes me uncomfortable. I've kept in mind that I may be known as the lady who gives out money, and among junkies in general, that reputation could jeopardize my safety. 

The second time was to one of the men who I felt overstepped boundaries with me - not in any physical way, but he says things I'm not comfortable with. He's another street person who has been the recipient of a couple of gifts - and even tried to repay me $2 once. So I felt a bit guilty walking by him, but an incident a few months ago really, really angered me, and I have to set that boundary. 

The work search continues. I am extremely grateful for my friend's offer, and I'm also aware that we're rapidly coming up on November, and I have moments of freaking out. I'm trying to stay in the moment; I know anything can happen (and we're not at November 1 yet), but I want to at least be able to tell my landlords when they're going to get the rest of October rent. Right now, it's not looking like that's going to happen before the beginning of November. But... anything can happen. I've certainly experienced enough amazing grace (including just yesterday) to know that.

I hope you all had wonderful Tuesdays. Cheers!

p.s. A few days ago, I mentioned that I'd placed a loonie among the leaves. What I didn't mention is that how well the loonie blends in with the colours. Today, I checked, and it's still there! (I actually had to hunt for it, because it was so well camouflaged). I'm curious to see how long it takes someone to find it.  

[Lefty]

I found the man playing you his song on the harmonica very sweet-that he somehow wanted to acknowledge your kindness.  I agree with Ann on the gut feeling.  Like the Girft of Fear book says-follow your instincts for safety.  And your gold coin is JUST like a geocache!  The good ones are blended in like that!

[Deb~ Community Manager]

I love this day you enjoyed. I am praying for you. You do so much for others, so freely from the heart.. I admire that in you.. You can send me an address at any time, kiddo! xoxo

[Lois55 wwt]

Again, I agree with Ann and Dawn, knowing that you will be there if there is a concern for the sister,must mean the world to the sister. You are totally awesome!!

[Ann]

You continue to amaze and motivate me with your selfless giving.  I know you brought peace of mind to the sister knowing that she can count on you to contact her when needed.  I am so glad that you follow your "gut feelings" when you feel that a situation is not safe for you.  You are in my thoughts and prayers.  I know something will open up for you soon.   

P.S.  Thank you for alerting me to M's post about cards to Frank.  I had missed that post.  I will send him a card tomorrow.

[Dawn wwt]

the gold coin sure does blend in with the autumn leaves! it will be interesting to see how long it takes before someone discovers it ;-) 

you let that woman's sister know that you care about her sister, that means a lot. your kindness is a gift to so many people you see each day and a lot that you never see. have a blessed night and peaceful dreams. Hugs, Dawn xoxo

[Lois55 wwt]

You gave great gifts today..the fact that you were given the cell phone number shows that you are trustworthy. Your kindness shows through...take care,  I hope the funds come in soon so you can get your rent paid up..hugs to you.xoxo